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This is the wrong kind of thinking, pure and simple. When Stan and Jack did the First Coming of Galactus, they didn't worry about where the Avengers were, or Spider-Man, or the X-Men. Guest appearances were rare, and Big Deals, and there was not an overwhelming need in the audience (and among certain writers) to treat every book as if it was THE AVENGERS.

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I picked this one example, because it was a common complaint, and the events in Thor lasted so long, months and months (felt like years), that I would think a quick couple of panels in Spider-man would have been nice and fun. 

that I would think a quick couple of panels in Spider-man would have been nice and fun. 

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And unnecessary.

MPH

So what.It wouldn't have hurt either.  It would have been a fun thing to add, that might have gotten Thor's monthly book a little bit of attention. 

But tell me, how would acknowledgeing that in one panel or even dialougue of hurt Spider-Man in any way?

Why interfer with the flow of the story unecessarily?  Makes no sense.

JB could have Batman swinging around in various exterior shots in BotD, but they are unecessary and would take people OUT of the story that he is telling.

MPH

Victor...you seem to miss my point...in the midst of a THOR story, having Spider-Man swing by in the background, even even showing a panel of him just for the sake of showing SPIDER-MAN is a distraction from the THOR story being told.

Clear?

MPH

I don't expect good writing or art from Marvel, or for characters to keep their eyeballs.  They can't keep up with their own books continuity. So I don't see why I would expect them to maintain a fictional universe.  

Eh, I just thought it would have been nice.

I wouldn't mind seeing a reference here or there, background or otherwise, to Batman either occasionally in BOTD.  Not saying at all that he should appear every time the Demon fights. I'm not demanding said references.

I can think of several instances where this was done and did not interrupt the story, so much as put a smile on my face. 

Bullshit.
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I enjoyed Man of Steel, but I don't know it I'd give it to say- a seven year old (eight year old-certainly), which prevents it from being All Ages. The two best examples of scenes slightly inappropriate for younger readers were Magpie's Happy Birthday gag, and Lex offering a woman a million dollars to be his for the month (although I should note that he never said what he woudl do to her.) These scenes were less excessive than those in most superhero comics published since then (and probably most manga too) but I wouldn't call the books "All-Ages" (unless "all-ages" refers to ten and up.)

So many of these problems would GO AWAY if our audience turned over every FIVE or SIX years like it is SUPPOSED TO!!!!

MPH
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I believe the availability of reprints prevents any advantages to audience turnover. The new audience will be familiar with the older material, and the creators won't be able to retell the same old stories.

It was just a nice touch for me growing up.  A neat way to find out about other stories, and to show they all lived in the same universe.  I wouldn't say every threat has to be acknowledged.  Not to have to read the other comic, and not even the whole comic devoted to said event, but some acknowlement of events sometimes is something I associate with Marvel, at least.

I enjoy a shared universe/continuity-as long as we don't get obsessive about it.  It is what helped me get really, really into comics. Marvel in particular.
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I believe un-necessary references to events in another book can take away from a story, and result in more confusion (for instance-  if one story takes place months later.) However as a (wannabe) writer I'm surprised more writers don't take advantage of strange events in other books for their own stories. A Spider-Man story where the Vulture tries to hide in Asgard (set when Asgard was floating above New York City) would work within the context of a Spider-Man book as an example of weird things happening in the Marvel U, and a Spider-Man villain taking advantage of them. However I don't think it should be mandatory for writers to refer to other works, especially given the different schedules they have (For instance- Grant Morrison was months ahead on his New X-Men scripts. Kevin Smith. Not so much.) Delays add to even more confusion.