Tom what a great post, I like how you both handled it, you saying I am sorry and him realizing you were stressed and let it slide, I have so much hope for you two crazy kids!

OK I am going to post something that is  a downer, but I just did a pissed post in the movie thread. This week, my son left for L.A. for an internship and more then likely a permanent move if he gets a job. The kid that has been living with us for the past year and a half, that has become like our third son, left today to move to NY City. I honestly can't stop crying, I am so happy they are becoming successful and doing well, but I can't hide the ache in my heart. Throw a case of flu on top and I am not handling life well. I know I shouldn't be so upset, I am  thankful they are healthy and having a great adventure. I will just miss them so much.

A cyber hug to you, Jodi.

 Brian you have no idea how much I needed that. All I ever wanted to be was a "mom" and I never had one moment were I haven't loved being one. I know my job as Mom is not over, it has just changed and I will get used to the distance. Just right now, it doesn't feel that way.

When I moved out I didn't talk to my parents very much, not because I didn't love them but due to a lack of news. I was fine, work was fine, love life was fine, nothing great was happening to inform them of and nothing bad was happening wherein I would need advice. I'd go months without talking to them, not due to any animosity but due to having nothing to say. I hate small talk, I hate talking about the weather, and without something to talk about I don't talk. That seems strange..., and it is untrue, I talk but most of the time it's a chore and I'd rather be silent. Unless you invite me out for dinner, if I am in a social situation I become vuloptuously wordy. Cracking jokes, making conversation, making sure everyone is involved and interested, I can talk politics and religion with people who completely disagree with me and have them laughing and enjoying themselves. That's a combination of my parents' approaches, she does the same by using small talk and conversational gambits but I couldn't do that without it coming across as fake (and without me wanting to punch me in the face) so I had to adopt my dad's approach; talk about what interests me. However, his approach utilized by him, does not work very well; for some reason he gets into adversarial conversations and people take him the wrong way.

After I started dating Danielle (nearly five years ago now) I started bringing her by my parents, at first once a month and then nearly every week. We'd play cards and games, I'd cook, or mom'd cook (and the other would bring the dessert) and we'd all have fun. In a way I guess Danielle was a bridge back to my parents.

I still ignore their advice as much as I can (a tradition) but I'm very glad they're both in my life.

And a cool thing is going to happen in a few years, Jodi, you'll be talking to your son as a man and as an equal. You will ask his advice, you will treat him differently and in a lot of ways you'll have a better relationship than now. That isn't to denigrate your relationship now, I've read your posts about your son and how proud you are of him, but I believe the evolving relationship with your growing children will actually be even better. Big hugs.

Great post, Tom, got a chuckle from it just because I've been that way a time or two with Danielle. Though I'm pretty much the opposite in that I'm the one that's usually late, I figure the party really starts when I arrive so people can wait for me. (That might sound jerky, but often I'm late because I'm sleeping. I have a swing schedule, midnights, afternoons, days, so on the weekends I have to sleep a ton to get back to feeling right. Friends often schedule things earlier on the weekend than I can arrive so I don't feel too bad when I show up a half hour or so late).

And I can't believe I missed the 200th page celebration! I was gonna make balloon animals! Okay, not balloons... more of a Puppetry of the p....., yeah, um, that kind of thing. Ah well, all that the best laid plans of mice and men means that at least someone is getting laid....

I know my job as Mom is not over, it has just changed

*****

Absolutely. And don't forget that your son and your "son" carry with them, wherever they go, every bit of mothering that you did. No matter how far, you're always with them.